WTF is Wrong with Hasselblad?!!

Hot on the heels of last week’s announcement that Leica plans to market a camera directly at Hedge Fund Managers…the All-White, $32,000 M9-P…the guys at Hasselblad must have figured that the market for ridiculously overpriced (and stupid) cameras is probably gaining traction again, cuz in my email box this morning was an announcement heralding a new “dedicated online site for the H4D Ferrari Limited Edition”, where prospective idiots buyers can, “…put themselves behind the wheel and to have a virtual test drive of a model that will only ever be owned by 499 photographers worldwide…”

What. The. Fuck.

OK…..I’m figuring that since this tarted-up whore of an HD4-40 was announced back in 2010, the branding geniuses who hatched this debacle are probably still up to their necks in the majority of the 499 HD4’s they ruined by slapping some glossy red paint and a Prancing Horse Logo onto the thing, but now they’re thinking, if Leica can sell a $9000.00 camera for $32 Grand, then we sure as Hell can charge $10 Grand for a Pimp-My-Ride-Style paint job on a $20,000 camera! So they put up a couple of new pages on their website, send out some emails to ‘re-introduce’ us all to this truly special bit of fluff, and hope for the best…’cuz if they don’t sell all 499 of these white red elephants (499 x $30K = $15 million) then it’s their ass!!!

Now, to be fair, the H4D Ferrari Limited Edition does come in an exclusive hand-made, carbon-fibery looking, glass topped case…surely to mimic same feeling you get when gazing upon the 562 Horses beneath the glass engine cover on your Ferrari 458 Italia…and Dr. Larry Hansen, the Chairman and CEO of Hasselblad, even slips in a hand-signed personal ‘Welcome Letter’, and that undoubtedly will make you feel extra-special important…

But I have to wonder…will the H4D Ferrari Limited Edition share any of the other traits and foibles Ferrari owners have a love/hate relationship with?!! Like the constant and expensive need of regular tune-ups, and will parts for the Limited Edition be equally overpriced, befitting a camera of such vaulted status??? Or, like the Ferrari which will only run on the finest hi-test fuel money can buy, will this Limited Edition H4D only take photos of ‘special’ subjects?!! You wanna shoot Supermodels and Arab Sheiks, okie-dokie, but try to use the thing for a day of High School Senior photos and it’ll seize up like you put sugar in its tank!!!

But maybe I’m wrong…maybe just knowing you own something only 498 other morons cloud-dwellers will possess will push your photography to previously unknown heights of excellence! I dunno…but one thing is for sure…I really would like that fancy velvet marble bag to keep my camera in…